Break-up Advice for Men - Don’t Leave Like a Louse!
By Jennifer Brown-Banks BREAK-UP ETIQUETTE FOR THE UNENLIGHTENED MAN Imagine this. Imagine that you report to your job for what would appear to be a typical work day. From all previous indications, your employer has been very satisfied with your performance. You arrive early, get to your office door, and the key wont fit. It appears that the lock has been changed. Even worse, you notice your nameplate has been removed from the door as well. Theres no one around to ask questions. But its obvious that your worst fear has been realized; youve been fired! And with no warning, no explanation, and no recourse! Imagine the confusion and the many unanswered questions this scenario would cause. Imagine the anger and disappointment. Multiply it by 100 times. Thats a fraction of what it feels like to a woman youve mysteriously dumped! Lets face it. Sometimes the need to sever ties from a former partner happens. Youve lost that lovin feeling or an old flame resurfaces to light your fire. Or perhaps its just irreconcilable differences. And it makes no sense to stick around and stay miserable. Right? It happens. Theres really no totally pain free way to move on. But that doesnt mean you should have a callous attitude, or opt for the cowards way out. Contrary to the popular song– there arent 50 ways to leave your lover! The way you leave a relationship speaks volumes about the type of man you are. It also shapes a womans future perceptions of herself and love in general. Bitter break-ups produce bitter women! Heres an online blog entry from a woman scorned that typifies many womens experiences: Im feeling so rejected, hurt and confused lately. Not a peep from the jerk. How could I have misread him so? I really thought he was a stand-up guy. I just dont understand why every guy I have fallen for in the past 4 years has pulled practically the same thing. Unfortunately, cycles perpetuate. Peter pays for the sins of Paul. According to John Gray, Ph.D. and author of Mars and Venus on a Date, Good endings create good beginnings. As someone who has been both the dumper and the dumpee in my relationships, I can attest, there is an art to ending an affair. Heres the politically correct way to pull it off! DONT FALL FOR THE GRASS IS GREENER FALLACY–ASSESS. Before leaving one woman to run to the arms of another, make sure that what you are risking is worth the tradeoff! Many times guys find a new love interest enticing just because of the unexplored pleasures and possibilities. The novelty. After the passage of time and getting to know the person, they find that what they bargained for is really less than what they already had. And often too late to do anything to rectify the situation. BE SENSITIVE TO HER FEELINGS- Practice the Golden Rule. Dont take the easy way out by sending her an E-mail or leaving a message on her answering machine. Its really uncool and unkind. Unless she has a history of violence, do it in person. Or by a phone call, or a caring, compassionate letter. IF THERE IS SOMETHING THAT CAN BE WORKED UPON, TALK IT OUT FIRST. Communication is crucial to any successful, enduring relationship. DONT BASH HER OR BLAME HER FOR EVERYTHING THAT WENT WRONG. It takes two to make or break a relationship. HAVE A HEART- If theres something that you can share in the way of constructive criticism that might help in the future, then do so. DONT OFFER FRIENDSHIP- At least not right away. Its offensive, and feels like a demotion. Unless the two of you started out as friends initially. KEEP IN MIND A BASIC LAW OF THE UNIVERSEWhat goes around comes around. Karma is a killer! DONT KISS AND TELLIts in poor taste, and if it gets back to her, it would only serve to deepen her pain DONT MAKE A MOVE ON HER BEST FRIEND! For reasons that I hope are obvious. GIVE HER AN EXPLANATION THATS FAIR AND REASONABLEPlease dont use the line that you need to find yourself its getting old! DONT BEOME M.I.A. (Missing in action)Many immature and insensitive guys choose this exit strategy. They simply stop calling or coming around cold-turkey, concluding that a woman will eventually figure it out. The terrible thing about this way of operating, is that it is the worse of all. It never allows a lover to bring closure to the relationship and heal properly. Keep in mind that these are general guidelines. Each situation should be evaluated on an individual basis. For example, if there is concern that a woman has the potential to become a fatal attraction, you may want to just change your address, go into seclusion for a while, and forget the above steps! Good luck with that. HERES HOPING FOR SMOOTHER TRANSITIONS AND LASTING LOVE! Jennifer Brown Banks is a veteran freelance writer, and writes a weekly relationship column for Online Dating Magazine. She is the author of “A Paradox in Pink.” Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Jennifer_Brown-Banks http://EzineArticles.com/?Break-up-Advice-for-Men—Dont-Leave-Like-a-Louse!&id=206953 tramadol ultram buy tramadol buy ultram order generic ultram online pharmacy tramadol 120 ea cheap ultram without a prescription